Hello, and welcome back to the Thoughts that Bind! And if you’re new, welcome to you. Today we’re going to talk about a subject that will help transform your life, although a little off the beaten path of our usual discourse.
We’ve talked about food on here before, although it’s been mostly about the consumption of it, whether it’s been about eating disorders or mindful eating. And those are important topics that I stand by. However, today I wanted to switch things up and talk about cooking with love.
Some of you may not know, but I enjoy cooking very much when I have the time on my hands. And as much as I view food preparation a general necessity if you want to live a healthy life (and happen to not have a personal chef or live in a place where healthy, ready-made food is available), I do think it’s worth diving into as its own simple pleasure and joy.
I’ve noticed over the years, the more love I put into my dishes, the better they seem to taste. Not only that, but they transform mealtime into a nourishing, fulfilling experience. I’ve even noticed that the more love I put into my meals, the more I want to eat healthfully. And these observations have all come to a sort of boiling point recently, when I realized just how my relationship with food has transformed since I started cooking. It’s for these reasons that I knew I just couldn’t keep this discussion to myself.
My own reservations about cooking with love
We hear about cooking with love from all sorts of places. Mostly thinking about the caring adults in our life who provided us with comfort food growing up or seemingly old-fashioned media where the family is enjoying food and the lady of the house proudly exclaims that “the secret ingredient is the love”. To be honest, these sorts of messages really used to get on my nerves.
Part of it was my warped relationship with food itself, to be sure. Another part of it, I believe to be the logically-minded part of me, was exclaiming that cooking is just science. Reactions between certain ingredients and combinations of flavors, nothing more could go into food preparation.
And you know, to some extent, I was right. It’s what you do with the ingredients that matters in food preparation. And so, it can easily be said that you don’t need to cook with love to make great food. And that would be true. However, I do think that cooking with love alters what you end up doing to the ingredients. And in this way, I do truly believe that someone cooking with love will make better food than they otherwise would, even with the same amount of knowledge and skill.
Cooking with love
So what does it mean to cook with love? For me, it’s about the attitude you approach cooking with. It’s a mindfulness, drinking in the present moment, enjoying the transformations of each ingredient, some big, others subtle. Carefully crafting a joyous balance of notes and experiences just to your liking.
I think cooking with love also has to do with your intentions as well. If you cook out of enjoyment of cooking itself, then perhaps all your dishes will be cooked with love. However, you can also utilize the love you have for yourself or the others who will be eating it, and in my experience that works just as well.
When you cook with love, you cook with focus. You’re willing to put that extra touch on things even if it takes a little more time or effort. You’re much more precise, tuned into what’s happening, and willing to put more care into your food.
What it helps
For example, say that you’re making a simple plate of spaghetti. If you’re doing it with love, you may decide to make your own sauce instead of use the jar, or maybe add some of your own spices or vegetables to adjust the taste to your preferences. Or if you’re a beginner, you might even just say “Hm, let’s try to heat this up instead of just pouring it on the noodles. That sounds nice.”
Essentially, you’ll end up using more of the techniques that you know how to use out of love for yourself, the moment, the process, the people who are going to be eating this food, or any combination thereof. You’ll have more fun cooking if you’re doing it with a heart full of love, too. That much should be ascertainable.
But as I said, I’ve also noticed that when I cook with love, I’ve been more interested in cooking healthy meals. I personally find this fascinating. It seems that the focus on the love helps me to view food more in the vein of “nourishment” instead of simply “taste” or “fuel”. It combines the nutritional focus of the “food is fuel” movement with the idea of comfort food in a very balanced way. Out of love for myself and all those eating it, I will want to make food that is good for our tastebuds as well as our bodies. And to me, the convergence of these ideas creates a sort of almost magical, quite intimate experience.
How to do it
So now that we’ve talked about cooking with love, let’s talk about how. For me, cooking with love is about adding mindfulness to your being as you cook. Being mindful of the present moment as you’re chopping or stewing (or whatever it is you’re doing) will help you be more in touch with the nature of the ingredients you’re using, as well as the emerging food that you’re making.
And also, be mindful with your own feelings. Keeping in touch with the sensations in your body as you cook (the heat, the cold, the motions of cooking, etc) will help ground you in this cooking experience. And keeping tabs on your emotional experience will help you with your intent. Are you thinking about nourishing yourself and any others? Are you enjoying yourself? The more you can connect with this aspect of cooking, the greater love will be in your cooking practice. And the more of the benefits you’ll be able to enjoy.
And it really is that simple. While it may take a while to get used to, cooking with love is a transformative and beautiful practice that I recommend you try. Leave a comment below if you like to cook with love. And if you’re interested in more ideas that can improve your life, subscribe to the blog to get email updates whenever a new post comes out. Thank you for reading!
